Friend breakups SUCK!
Cause you want to “unbothered” but it actually hurts you deep down.
Whether you had a Frenemy and decided to finally cut the plug,
Or ended things in a huge fight,
Or let things slowly fizzle out silently,
You are NOT Alone!
This blog post is for you!
Especially if this friendship lasted 5, 20, or even 20 years. You should take some time to think about what went wrong. Every ending has a new beginning and you want to take as many life lessons as possible. Although it may be easy to just blame the other party… think about how you played a part as well.
- How could I have been a better friend?
- What did I do to play a part in this?
- How will I treat my future friendship differently?
Bitterness and a sprinkle of PETTY! These are all “normal” feelings to have after calling off a friendship no matter how long it lasted.
You’re going to feel confused, indecisive, and all over the place right after. Whether it was your decision, their decision, a mutual agreement or a natural drifting apart, it doesn’t change these feelings or deny them from yourself.
Just like a romantic break-up --- it’s part of the process.
Depending on the depth of the friendship your friend was your ride or die B*tch, the Ying-to-your-Yang, PB to your Jelly.
Especially if things ended on a bad note, this may feel like a HEARTBREAK! Treat it as such. You have every right to feel down and confused about the outcomes of this “failed friendship”. Any emotions you feel: anger, resentment, sadness, confusion, allow yourself to feel them.
Ending a friendship is tough, you probably shared secret with this person, allowed them to see you at your lowest, and put a lot of effort into the relationship. The most devastation comes from you wondering if your secrets will be kept and your reputation tarnished.
Good news!!!! There are 8 billion people on this Earth, and many that’ll find a connection with you. Realize that there is potential to make new bonds (if you allow).
I know that your trust may be broken, a wall built-up high as Humpty Dumpty’s and you may be questioning every friendship that you have.
This is expected, especially in the beginning --- all I’m saying is... there are plenty of friendly fishies in the sea. :)
As some wise, UNNAMED, man once said… When one door closes, another one opens (or something like that). As hard as it seems, as an adult you can build new meaningful friendships out in the world.
If you’re at a time in your life where your friendships are thin, and you feel more alone than ever, this may be a sign from the universe for you to focus on YOU!
You have more time for yourself and less to delegate to others. If you haven’t yet, discover your passion, seek your purpose and revisit the dreams you always had and maybe put off due to “not having enough time”.
Some friendships end due to growing apart .
A childhood friend you once related to might not suffice anymore, you need friends that blend better with the NEW YOU -- new hobbies, new interest, new mindset.
As far as the bad traits you tolerated from your Ex-friend:
- Jealousy, sabotage, messy/pettiness, bitterness, toxicity, poor communication, selfishness, dishonesty, untrustworthy.
You don’t have tolerate those anymore. So when you’re making new friends, choose friends who have positive traits:
- Accepting, supportive, loving, great communication, honest, dependable, caring, encouraging
If you see someone you admire, compliment them and introduce yourself.
Although this generation seems to think speaking to people in public instead of the DMs is “weird/creepy” don’t fall into that trap.
Be social you never know the type of relationships that can blossom from you taking action and putting yourself out there.
Find people who like to do similar things.
If you love to dance, talk to other dancers.
If you’re a gym freak, make conversation in the gym.
If you’re a Youtuber/blogger reach out to others like you.
There are people on this Earth that relate and will connect with you, FIND THESE PEOPLE.